Something that I believe that everyone should know about me is that I tend to scream in my sleep.
Every night, I get prone to night terrors due to my PTSD. Whether if it’s spiders or being abused by my teachers or maybe even my history of screaming at random people just because I despised them for their asininity, I tend to scream during my slumber.
My history of post-traumatic stress disorder is mainly caused by the physical and emotional abuse I received from my teachers during elementary school and middle school. My memories were vague but lucid enough for me to be reminded by the trauma I received.
I’d be back in time when my teachers:
- nearly broke my arms by their force
- locked me inside the classroom closets
- hit me hard on my head until bumps appeared
- never save my life whenever classmates pushed or pulled me down the stairs
- made me skip lunch and snack time so I’d starved throughout the day while getting punished
- screamed obscenities at me while my classmates laughed
- gave me tons of bruises all over my body from their physical force
Everything I mentioned caused me permanent trauma.
Hence, the reasoning behind my chronic insomnia caused by my night terrors.
This is truly something that I believe that I should let people know about me whenever they sleepover at my place or sleep in the same hotel room as me. I’m not meant to sleep with anyone in the same bed as me; the last thing I wanted is to wake them up in the middle of the night from my sleep-induced night terrors.
Worst case scenario, there is a possibility that I also may toss and turn violently in my sleep. It is doable that I may punch or kick while sleeping and screaming. I do not want to endanger someone with my sleep-induced violence.
I’m still prone to having night terrors. However, I’m still seeking professional help from my weekly sessions with my psychotherapist.
I’m not sure how long these PTSD-induced night terrors will continue, though as long as I resumed seeking help for this, then I may be liberated from this prolonged nightmare.
As long as I continue to seek interpersonal help and taking my medications every night, then I soon hope that everything will be back to normal.