I am creative because I am full of imagination.
Ever since I was little, I have been very imaginative; everything I see and hear stays within my mind, whether real or not, and I just couldn’t help but to stay within my own fantasies. Whenever these fantasies appear, I get the urge to write about them, so that I could keep them as mementos. Of course, I didn’t have the audacity to share them to the world for self-explanatory reasons, so I wrote them into my locked diaries. Whenever there was something melancholic, such as a rainy and stormy day, or something ire, such as a fight with a friend, I would open up my diaries and read my fantasies as a form of escapism. Reading my recorded imaginations truly calmed me down back them during the darkest hour.
Now that I have grown into the person I am today, I looked back to these little childhood fantasies, and they made me realize that I have what it takes to become a writer. I don’t see myself as the next J.K. Rowling or J.R.R. Tolkien since I outgrew these fantasies; these kinds of imaginations faded away to the abyss by the time I reached adulthood. Although, that doesn’t stop me from pursuing my career as an author.
During my adulthood as I come up with new mature imaginations, I have been doing researches on societal issues, such as homelessness and domestic violence, both of which led me to write my novels, “No Turning Back” and “Don’t Stay” respectively.
“No Turning Back” came from when I’ve seen and read stories about homeless runaway youths and the reasons why they escaped from their households to live on the streets and fight for survival while hiding from their old dysfunctional lives. I’ve also read about crimes and poverty that were very common around the world and how these certain types of people fight for their chances to survive. These inspired me to write this novel because not only I wanted to share my creative imagination about the real world, but I also wanted to talk about these particular types of issues that needed to be fixed and simultaneously spread awareness in order to help these runaway teens from living on the streets and to bring them shelter. Hopefully, my novel, “No Turning Back,” will open my readers’ eyes about what the world has come to and help those who are in need. That is truly what I wanted my viewers to think about this book I wrote.
“Don’t Stay” is different. This novel I wrote was inspired by my previous toxic relationships with men in the past; albeit not entirely physical abuse in reality, they were mainly inspired by the emotional abuse I suffered from the last man I dated (whom I will not name for reasons). I’ve had fights with this particular man who was in my previous life, and after seeing the light to this toxic relationship, I decided to eternally leave him and never let him back into my life. As I recalled these unwanted memories, it shed light to my next novel, which is this. I suddenly became creative when I imagined myself in the victim’s shoes of falling victim to domestic violence multiple times and how this particular abusive relationship have turned into Stockholm Syndrome until the victim saw the light herself and decided to escape just like I did with this last man. Also, after I left this man, I came into realization about my romantic feelings for women after having sexual fantasies about being with women in my dreams. My infatuation and love with women made me want to write about the victim leaving her abusive ex with another woman and ending it with an elating tone. I became creative about writing “Don’t Stay” based on my personal experiences with toxic men and being with a woman of my dreams (if I ever find one, but not right now). I wanted to spread awareness with this novel about the dangers and toxicity of abusive relationships and that the perfect one love could be in front of you during a long-term friendship with that special someone, regardless of gender and sexuality. That is exactly the main point of this book I wrote.
Apart from my two aforementioned novels, I’ve also written a novella, “Treat Myself Better,” based on my personal experiences, albeit under the nom de plume, Ryenne Nova. As I was writing this piece of work, I received flashbacks of what I went through during high school: I was bullied, I suffered from anorexia nervosa, I self-injured, and I bonded with most of the boys. The latter became the reason why I was bullied; I was called a “slut” by most girls and they spread rumors about me hitting and flirting with these boys I hung out with, even though they were just friends and I was never into them. Everything here brought me trauma throughout high school and these became unwanted memories that I just wanted to erase, though I couldn’t. As I looked back to these memories and everything that I went through, from high school drama to being pressured to be perfect, I wanted to express these thoughts into a book. However, since “Treat Myself Better” is heavily based on my personal experiences, I decided to write it under a pseudonym because I was worried for being called out for writing self-inserts. Despite all the drama, pressure, and struggles I went through in high school, I still became creative by putting myself into a happier, though poignant, escapism where I wanted to be myself and become the better and stronger person I am today. I also wanted to spread awareness to eating disorders, self-injury, bullying, and how much high school dramas can impact one’s mental health. I do hope that this novella of mines would encourage my viewers to become fighters and to perceive the common struggles of being an adolescent.
To sum everything up, I became creative with as long as I could remember and I knew right away that it led to my passion for writing. I will persist being imaginative from inspirations, whether if it’s my personal experience or from what I read from other people’s stories, and these imaginations will help me pursue into becoming the notable writer I will become someday. I will persist doing what I love to do and keep being creative as I come up with new fantasies whenever I sleep at night. Hopefully, if I remember these dreams, they will inspire me to write new fictional stories that will, hopefully, become famous in the future.
-Nicole “Nix” Cheng, 2024